Relationships

The Dawning of Grandparenthood

One of the great adventures life has to offer is being a grandparent. A while back my son and daughter-in-law came to see me. He walked up and handed me a pacifier. "What's this for?" I asked in confusion. Then slowly, as my thoughts rushed in on me, the light dawned. "I'm too young to be a grandmother!" But I was thrilled....a grandmother ....think of that!

Through the next months of expectation I thought about becoming a grandmother. I would share this adventure with my son and daughter-in-law, her parents, and my other children who were becoming a first-time aunt and uncle. Becoming a grandparent is both common and yet mysterious. As the "older" side of the family, I could now pass on traditions and stories. I was quick to call my mother and tell her, "Now we will both be grandmothers!"

What was to be expected of me as a grandmother? There are books on parenthood, but not many on grandparenting. A rich and warm balance between generations will give the new baby a sense of security from the first moments of his/her birth. Following are ideas for which the new parents will appreciate you:

Remember, you are not the parent-- you had your turn. Hold your tongue, listen, and give your support for the parents' decisions.
It's up to the parents to choose a name. You, however, get to decide what your grandchild will call you.
Find out in advance how to be most helpful in the days after the birth. Daughter-in-laws may be most comfortable with their mothers helping, or the parents may want time alone with their new baby.
In the excitement of a new baby, don't forget your children. Buy a present for the proud parents-as well as for your new grandchild.
When everyone else is cooing and fluttering around the new baby, don't be one more person making demands on the parents. Be the person they can count on.
And last of all, don't forget to celebrate yourself. After all....now you're a Grandparent!

National Grandparents Day is September 10.